Friday, November 7, 2008

Sausage Casing, $9.08

I bought a new skirt yesterday at Target, upon returning a blazer I bought last weekend. The skirt is super cute, there's a sexytime zipper in the back that goes all the way from the bottom to the top. It was 75% off, I got it for $9.08! I was proud of myself when I bought it because Target sizes are usually small, and I was able to buy the sexy zipper skirt in my regular size. I even tried it on, just to be sure. I should mention that I hadn't eaten all day yesterday at the point when I did the on-trying, and still thought buying a snug, tailored skirt was a good idea.

Developments of the day today show that I should never purchase my true size at Target.

I should have recognized the omen this morning, of how when I went to get in the Beastie, my range of motion was severely impaired by the snug-to-my-knees hem of my sexy zipper skirt. My 4-inch heel did not clear the Beastie's running board, I then fell face first into my center console.

You should never buy your ideal size at Target, especially when you debut your sexy sexy skirt on a coworker/friends birthday. Especially when that coworker/friend is the Cupcake Queen, and brought in Banana Chocolate cupcakes to celebrate said birthday. Especially when you go out for lunch (for said coworkers said birthday, prior to said supcakes) and get an incredibly rich grilled veggie wrap and eat the whole thing, and the fries that came with it. Especially when you go to Starbucks after lunch and get a venti iced tea. Especially when you went to Starbucks on the way to work and got a venti iced coffee.

Death bloat. Even undoing the zipper a little doesnt help. I cant wait to go home and change.

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