Noxious, P.I.

We all have those things that drive us absolutely batty in the office and sometimes you cant take the irritation and headaches anymore, so you fly off the handle and order your coworkers some fume-less Sharpie mega markers so they don't have to use the smelly ones and give you migraines. 

Meet Magnum:

I personified him with a photo of Tom Selleck as a reference to Magnum, P.I., the hit show of the 80's.  Not only because because he is not allowed to be used in the office anymore when I'm around, but also because it's a reminder that Tom Selleck is a big, smelly tool. 

Along with Magnum, other things I have forbidden the usage of while I am in the office is as follows:

• Lauren's instant maple oatmeal
  
• Rob cutting his fingernails while he's on the phone
  
• Rob emailing me cartoons or skits that I have to "read"
• Kate mooning me unintentionally when she wears that one skirt
  
• Repetitive over-use of the paper cutter
• Pregnant lady terminology 
• Derek's ninja moves

Fittingly, Kate just used Magnum, so I stole him and am plotting his death.