introspective city!

For years I've told myself that I don't fear anything.   

Recently, I've found this notion to be false.  

Tongiht, in light of recent events, I took some time to write down everything I am afraid of. I gave myself one hour, and went at it; stream-of-consciousness style.  

I thought that opening my mind to my blog isnt a horrible idea.  This is my personal place to say ..what *I* want!  I do hope you understand.  So.  Here goes, as was jotted alongside the road \ in my moleskine notebook:

• losing my best friend
  
• my brother joining the army
  
• my brother going to afghanistan
  
• my brother dying 
  
• losing my job
  
• staying in the same job for another 5 years
  
• being broke
  
• being too alone
  
• gaining too much weight
  
• going too crazy
  
• crashing in a plane
  
• hitting a deer
  
• cancer, again
  
• the supernatural
  
• being stagnant and uncreative/boring
  
• lack of appropriate degree
  
• never being able to wear heels again
  
• not looking/being attractive
  
• compromising myself to give into my fears
  
• coming off as weak
  
• running out of money
  
• never learning how to grow up
  
• alcoholism/addiction
  
• disease/promiscuity
  
• being unwanted
  
• annoying the ones I love
  
• dying with no offspring
  
• finding someone
  
• not wanting children
  
• do I travel enough?
  
• seeing the world while I can
  
• being content where I am/wanderlust
  
• losing my family to something else
  
• losing my friends to something else
  
• my family making poor financial decisions
  
• investments
  
• opinions of my work supervisors
  
• not having a passion, not caring
  
• facial hair
  
• ebola
  
• biological warfare
  
• going to places alone
  
• math
  
• STD's
  
• the dark- why am I so afraid? 
  
• anxiety attacks in meetings/social situations
  
• being a disappointment to family
  
• bringing a man home to my parents
  
• meeting that man
  
• facing commitment
  
• making life mistakes in general
  
• becoming too comfortable
  
• becoming too comfortable alone
  
• being on medication
  
• babies
  
• infection
  
• no one wants to hear my fears
  
• and my worries
  
• sinning
  
• lack of religion
  
• not appearing to be happy
  
• not being happy
  

So, that's that. Pure from the heart. 

Video credit: CHUCK