I fall to pieces, which then turn to mush

Did you ever feel like you were just watching your body perform, with little or no control over what it does? Thats me today. Its like the scene from Fear & Loathing, where HST is walking through the swamp that is his hotel room, like some sort of space alien. I felt like my legs weighed nothing earlier, therefore I was over compensating for their actual weight, and ended up practically goosestepping my way to the water fountain.

Yesterday I took a personal day and got a lot done. Define "a lot" however you must, but I did get an oil change and some much needed recreation. Nothing illegal. Certainly nothing that would warrant this kind of physical torture.

I broke the diet bad, over imbibed, and feel like these things are responsible for my slow-headedness. That, and being back in the office doesn't help.

I fell asleep by 730 yesterday. PM. Little did I know my windows were open, and front door unlocked. I had bad dreams about people sneaking in while I slept (My body knew I should get up and secure my surroundings!), these people happened to be of latino heritage, and were building a garage for my grandmother. In my dream I kept referring to them as Amish, and they disassembled my air conditioner more than once, trying to sneak into my bedroom. Weird. Then I had a dream that I was in my friend Amy's wedding (which was being held at the Christian winter camp I went to when I was 14 - in the Adirondack Mountains), and the dress I had to wear was too big, and she wanted to postpone the wedding until the next day so I could have it altered. And then someone peed on my dress and I decided to make the alterations myself since it was already covered in pee. Hmph.

Switching gears: I feel extremely taken advantage of, lately. Some people (no one reading this, or I wouldn't be writing it) just leech everything I have to offer, and give nothing in return. We're talking emotional support, advice, help in general. I really hate it when I listen, analyze and put true effort into the betterment of someone else's life, and when I need something? They're like dust in the wind. Karma will get 'em, right? :( Specifically, someone I work with. This isn't the first time she's done it to me. I never learn my lesson, I'm too much of a giver, and I need to learn to say no.

Jojo needs some love.